Met with a friend today. Someone who as soon as I met her, I instantly liked her. A person who constantly surprises me with how amazing she is . . . but is also really humble about it.
So as we’re in my living room eating snacks and talking it occurs to me that there is another aspect of my life story worth sharing.
This aspect of my life is more personal . . . and definitely more daunting than anything else I’ve considered sharing.
It’s concerns my relationship with my Mom who passed of Lupus in 1978.
How my misdirected attempts to be like her and keep her legacy alive nearly killed me. And affected me very adversely.
On the flip-side . . .
How, miraculously, I’ve manage to find a healthy and more constructive way to connect with her now – in recent years. Through strange and unlikely means.
It’s not easy to think about sharing something so intimate. But just as in my health story I have to consider how other aspects of my story can possibly help others.
I grew up without my mother from age six and I have felt that loss, (that void) from the Saturday night in November when my Dad tried to explain to me that she was gone until today.
I will continue to think about, and miss, my Mom until I die. It’s one of the constants in my life.
I remember my Dad asking me, “Do you remember where your Granny went?” Being six and not realizing he was trying to make me say heaven, I responded with the name of a local shop that my Granny and I went to together before she died. (I was six.) 🙂
This is a big revelation and I know I have a lot to think about.
Is this a book? Is this aspect of my story an essay or an article only?
As with all things precious to me, I will hold the idea close to my heart and wait for the appropriate time to share it.
I need to thank my friend for a wonderful afternoon and a good (and daunting) idea to ponder.